Hello everyone and welcome back to the REM arena. Tonight we have a very special match for you. One that is so special I�ve spent about 6 weeks trying to decide who will be in it. As I type this now I still have not decided officially on the participants. I know one will be the Big Red Machine Kane. The other I�m thinking a more current main event start. Batista? No, these two have had battles. Undertaker? Clich�. How about�John Cena. He�s a fresh talent, and one that hasn�t really faced Kane one on one. Oh, and remember this one is for the crowning of the first ever REM World Heavyweight Championship. Ring the bell!
Without wasting anytime this one is underway. They start circling each other with their fists up. They decide to lock up. They struggle for control, until Kane pushes John to the ground. Cena gets up, and looks at Kane, as he is not used to being out matched in strength. He acts like they are going to lock up again, but he shoots the legs. He trips up Kane making him land on his stomach. Immediately he tries for the STFU, but Kane rolls over, and uses his legs to push off Cena. Kane gets to his feet as Cena charges. Cena is met with a big right hand from the Big Red Machine. Kane lays in some more big right hands,., before one eventually floors Cena. He brings Cena up, and whips him into the ropes. When he comes back he hit�s a hip toss,,, and follows up with an elbow. He covers for one. Kane stands up and stomps Cena over to the ropes. The ref tells him to back off while John works his way to his feet. As Kane makes his way back towards his adversary he�s met with a right hand from Cena. Cena battles off of the ropes, and stuns Kane in the middle of the ring. He bounces off the ropes, but Kane catches him in a sidewalk slam, and covers. 1...2...kick out!
Kane takes to a mounted position, and starts throwing haymakers at his opponent. The referee makes Kane let John catch a breather. Cena pulls himself up in the corner. Kane charges at him,custom bobblehead, but John moves, just in the nick of time. Cena follows up with a chop block that brings Kane to one knee. He then kicks the Big Red Monster in the head. Cena brings Kane to his feet, and tries for a fisherman suplex, but Kane�s too big. He releases and Kane throws a big right, but Cena ducks it. Cena moves behind Kane, and gets him in a rear waist lock. Kane tries to break The Champ�s grip, but can�t. He resorts to throwing elbows into John�s head. He breaks the grip, and floors Cena with a big right hand. Cena rolls to the ropes. Kane follows, and holds onto the ropes while he stands on his rival�s throat. He holds it until the four count,customized bobbleheads, and steps off. He grabs him by the head, and brings him to his feet. Kane pushes him into the near turnbuckle, and hits him with a big back elbow. He then starts stomping Cena in the corner. The ref makes him get out of the corner. Kane pulls Cena to his feet. He throws him into the ropes, but when he comes back he ducks a clothesline from Kane. He rebounds by hitting a Thesz press with punches on his adversary. Cena continues the beat down for a while until he decides to get up. He throws Kane into the ropes, and gests ready for a back body drop. Kane goes to kick him in the chest, but John catches it, and trips him. He turns his opponent onto his stomach,Contemporary Archery Sights With Brilliant Quality, and steps over for the STFU. Kane manages to grab the bottom rope before The Champ can apply any pressure. He stomps on Kane�s back, while Kane slowly makes his way back to his feet. Kane is eventually able to land a blow to Cena�s gut. He follows it up with a huge uppercut to his throat.
Cena stumbles back into a corner. Kane follows, and begins choking him in the corner. Then he launches him into the opposite corner,custom bobbleheads, and hits him with a big body attack. Before Cena falls, he hit�s a big clothesline in the corner; flooring Cena. He grabs, the grounded Chain Gang Commander by the throat, and brings him up. He lifts him for a Chokeslam, but he manages to get out of it at the last second. He nails Kane with a big kick to the gut, and then rebounds off the ropes,,, and hit�s the throwback face buster. He covers for a two. He brings Kane up, and tries to whip him into the ropes, but The Big Red Machine reverses it. When Cena comes back he ducks a big boot. He bounces off the ropes again, and hit�s a flying shoulder block. Kane gets up, and Cena tries for another one, but Kane gets the big boot up before Cena can knock him down again. Kane covers for two.
While he still has Cena on the mat The Big Red Monster commences to choking him. He chokes until the four count when he breaks. He waits for Cena to get up, and then hits him with a huge running clothesline. Kane brings him up,personalized bobbleheads, and whips him towards a corner, but this time it�s John that reverses it. Kane�s back hit�s the corner, he stumbles out, and John capitalizes by hitting a one handed bulldog on the opponent. Seeing his opportunity he climbs up top. He waits for Kane to get up enough to where he�s bent over. He jumps for his diving leg drop, but Kane catches him in a power bomb, and slams him down hard. Kane covers. 1...2...Cena kicks out.
Kane is getting tired, and frustrated. He tightens his glove, and gestures for the choke slam as he waits for John to get up. When The Chain Gang Commander finally gets to his feet and turns around Kane tries to goozle him. He�s quick enough to go under the outstretched hand. When Kane turns around he�s dropkicked into the ropes. The Champ runs toward him, but he�s thrown overhead. Luckily he landed on the apron. When Kane turns around, Cena hit�s a shoulder to his gut, followed by a sunset flip. It�s all for not though, as Kane rolls through and hits John with a low dropkick. Kane covers again for a two. Kane is getting angrier every time John kicks out. He slowly starts to climb the turnbuckle. Once he�s there John musters just enough strength to throw himself into the ropes, causing Kane to fall on his�well�nuts. Kane topples from the turnbuckle, and John capitalizes. He brings up Kane,personalized bobble heads, and hit�s a big Fisherman�s Suplex. He covers,custom bobblehead, but it�s only a two.
Cena gets in position, and waits for Kane to arise. When Kane gets up he runs off the ropes,The Most Powerful Bad Debt Tips, an hit�s a shoulder block, and then another. He moves behind Kane,customize bobblehead, and hit�s a protobomb. He moves to Kane�s head,customized bobbleheads, and lifts his hand into the air. He bends over and gets in Kane�s face,Cash Loan Sameday Payout � Loan Scheme To Fulfill Immediate Needs, then waves his hands while reciting, �You Can�t See Me.� He bounces off the ropes, a and hit�s the 5 Knuckle Shuffle. He now awaits Kane to get to his feet so he can administer an F U. He brings his opponent into the fireman�s carry position, but Kane drops behind him,custom bobblehead, and uppercuts him. Kane staggers backwards from exhaustion, and Cena staggers form the impact. John manages to run towards Kane for a running cross body, but gets caught. Kane slams Cena, and then climbs the turnbuckle. As his adversary gets up Kane leaps into the sky, and comes down like a rain of fire with a big clothesline. Once more he gestures for the Chokeslam. As The Champ reaches a vertical base he is goozled, lifted into the air,customize bobblehead, and slammed hard. 1...2...NO! Cena somehow manages to kick out. Kane, astonished, isn�t sure what to think. He takes a moment to think,custom bobbleheads, and then decided to go up top again. This time when he leaps, Cena catches him with a leaping drop toehold, right into ant STFU. Cena cranks it with every remaining ounce of energy he has left. Kane reaches for the ropes, but he�s right in the middle of the ring. Ever so slowly he inches his way towards the salvation of the rope. Finally after almost a full minute in the hold he grabs hold of the bottom rope, forcing Cena to break the hold. Cena breaks and rolls off his adversary, fearing his only chance to put him away just slipped through his fingers. Kane groggily pulls himself up against the ropes. He turns his head to see John recovering as well. Kane throws a big punch, but Cena ducks it, and lifts Kane for an F U, and hits it. 1...2...NO! Somehow Kane managed to kick out of the F U. Cena is at a loss. With nothing left to lose he moves Kane to the corner, and lifts him onto the turnbuckle. Cena starts to try and superplex Kane, but he won�t go. Finally he lifts The Big Red Monster vertical from the top turnbuckle, but Kane drops behind and lands on the mat. Cena turns, and jumps at him, but he�s caught by the throat. Quickly Cena slaps away his opponent�s hand,personalized bobblehead, and lifts him for another F U. However,Who Needs PCI Compliance, Kane drops behind, keeps hold of Cena. He lifts him backwards, into a Tombstone position, and drives his head into the mat. Kane brings John up, and Chokeslams him one last time. 1...2...3! Kane wins! Kane is the first ever REM World Heavyweight Champion. Congratulations to Kane, and good luck to him Sunday at WrestleMania 25.
Now, GET OUT OF MY HEAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jun 13, 2015
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